Saudi airforce pilot delighted with his National 4 Pass in Lifeskills Maths

With the Scottish Qualifications Authority under fire from Green Ginger Party MSP Ross Greer for letting Saudi Arabians sit SQA exams because they like to make your girlfriend Kirsty wince at that old Chandler Bing joke on Friends about moving to Yemen to escape Janice because now they’ve blown the shit out of a good chunk of it over the last five years, the Daily Gael spoke to one of the affected candidates, Royal Saudi Airforce F-15 Pilot Flight Lieutenant Khalil Hassan.

Khalil told the Gael; “Yeah, I never really stuck in at school, so despite having enough qualifications for flying a figher plane I felt that it was a good thing that I could sit some Scottish Qualifications here in Saudi, just a bit of craic between morning prayers and warcrimes bombing Shia militias in Yemen before lunch.”

Khalil initially found it hard to study, even up to his final deadline for sitting the final internally assessed elements. “My mum and dad said I couldn’t do a bombing run of a civilian wedding party the night before my final unit assessment, but instead I went out and wiped out a whole bunch of Houthis and nailed it. I really enjoyed the fact that there was no external assessment too though, I have a stressful enough job thanks very much.”

Khalili was also inspired by the social media feeds of politicians telling him that no matter his results, he could still have any future he wantedl “I really take heart from the message, No Wrong Path. Well unless you’re that wedding party that I blew up, they should have taken the mountain pass, much more cover.”

A spokesperson for the Saudi Government said “We’re delighted about Khalil getting his National 4 Lifeskills Maths. It’s all part of our DYW agenda – Divebombing Yemeni Weddings – and we’re dead keen on keeping up our employability scheme for you lovely British folk who send us your Tornadoes and Eurofighters.”