Police Scotland searching for driver who didn’t wave

Police Scotland

Police Scotland have launched a manhunt across the Highlands and Islands after “some bastard” forgot to wave on a single track road.

“They just drove straight past me like I wasn’t even there” said Norma Harris. “I didn’t lose control or anything but I felt the only decent thing to do was to crash into a fence to show how shocked I was.”

Reports on the culprit are conflicting but Police Scotland have instructed residents to be on the look out for a man, or possibly woman under the age of 100, who may or may not have hands.

“I have lost all faith in humanity” said Chief Superintendent Julian Innes. “We might as well hand give back all the poppers and heroin we had been saving for the Christmas party and watch while Inverness is burnt to the ground”.

The incident is widely regarded as the worst thing to happen since the infamous “Allan” left the pub before getting his round in, resulting in a fourteen year stint behind bars, followed by deportation.