Hearach breaks Black Mirror’s Bandersnatch – Keeps on ending up on the deoch

Pictured – Fionn Whitehead

 Netflix’s new choose your own adventure Black Mirror from the twisted mind of satirist Charlie Brooker has been broken by Donald Calum MacSween from Harris.

Bandersnatch is the story of Stefan a troubled 19 year old computer programmer who is trying to adapt a dystopian sci-fi novel called Bandersnatch. The show proceeds along the lines of a  choose your own adventure story. Donald Calum, known as DC to his friends, Lachie, Ali and Dol Ali Lachie, started of conventionally but then a strange thing happened.

No matter which choice DC picks, the result for tortured Stefan is the same – he ends up on a three day bender in the Southside of Glasgow in the early 1980s.

“We didn’t even film these scenes” said Mr Brooker “I don’t know how Mr MacSween has done this, but he seems to have totally created a new decision tree. It’s probably not as disturbing or unsettling as my usual fare, but I can get on board with it.”

Donald Calum said “Well, I just felt the poor balach could do with a dram and some pints with the lads. I can see what this chap Brooker was trying to do to make some comments about free will and reality and killing your parents, but I think the ending I’ve created is much more enjoyable for all concerned. In fact the whole adventure will only come to an end when Stefan takes the cùram and decides to clean up his act.”

The real creepy part of this whole tale is in true Black Mirror fashion, in what alternate reality did someone in Harris get enough bandwidth to actually achieve this?