Larry the 10 Downing Street Cat to be swiftly deported
With Theresa may due to take up residence in 10 Downing street, senior civil servants have confirmed that the much beloved “Larry the cat” is to be deported as he has not met the required £35k earning threshold.
Domestic Cats are thought to have originated in ancient Egypt 4000 years ago which certainly didn’t help Larry’s application to stay. The home office is currently debating whether to arrange a flight for the beleaguered feline or to have him humanely catapulted over the English channel.
Andrea Leadsom who paved the way for Theresa May’s premiership by dropping out of the leadership race offered no sympathy due to Larry not being a mother.
Theresa May commented:
“Get the fuck away from me. I have read your emails and I will have you deported” she smiled wryly.
Larry was more pensive
“I miss shiny twat man, I wish I hadn’t voted leave”.