“I can’t wait to be a Mòd mum” says Ruth Davidson

Media darling and Scottish politician Ruth Davidson, who is expecting her first child with her partner, Jen Wilson, has announced that she “desperately wants to be a Mòd mum” in an interview with BBC Scotland.

“I used to hate Gaelic because of my time at the BBC when the Dè a-nis? team would get to the macaroni cheese in the canteen before me, but impending motherhood and a sit down with Cameron of Locheil has convinced me otherwise.” Said the leader of the Scottish Conservative & Unionists.

“I’d just like to announce that me and Jen are going to put our youngster into Gaelic Medium Education. The Tory Party have long supported parental choice in education and GME also seems to be funded by some sort of Dark Money so I can get onboard with that.” Ruth has also told her back-benchers to “lay-off that pish about Gaelic roadsigns cause it makes us look like a bag of dicks.”.

Parenthood sa Ghàidhlig holds many excitements for Ruth but there was one thing she was the most excited about, “I can’t wait to be a Mòd mum! I’ve already got my disapproving scowl down pat! Although I do think they should rename it the Royal Union Mòd, just to make sure!”

Ruth also closed with her plan to strengthen the bonds within the United Kindom, “I’ve asked Arlene Foster to be the godmother and hope she’ll also take a more enlightened on Gaelic rights in Northern Ireland as a result of this. Thanks for the orange babygrow Auntie Arlene.”